There was a time when I was lost and felt like nobody understood me. With this state of mind, I was writing songs like this Audio: Jeff Mac – Nobody Understands (2005)
Fortunately, I was able to discover a path towards finding and understanding myself. If you’re at a certain point in your life and you’re not happy, the majority of your actions and ways of thinking are not helping you.
Here are 7 ways to begin finding yourself:
1. Take time for some honest reflection.
Where are you right now and how do you feel about it? It all starts with affirming the truth, no matter what it is. Acknowledge that you’re lost, lonely, broke, frustrated, etc. Once you begin in a place of honesty, you will be able to build a more solid foundation and map out the path to get you away from your place of dissatisfaction.
2. Begin building courage by making minor changes to your daily routine.
If you want things in your life to change, you must change things in your life. Start small and build momentum. Think of 1 small thing you can change. Either add something positive into your life or take away something negative from your life. Engage in activities you’ve never done before. Listen to different music, try new foods, stop sleeping in, network with different social groups, etc. These small changes will build up over time, resulting in major changes.
3. Examine your environment and influences.
Look around you. Who’s influencing your life? The thoughts, actions and attitudes of the people around you will eventually rub off on you. What do they have you listening to, watching, reading, and thinking?
4. Let go of worry and start focusing on what you want.
The more you worry about something bad or negative, the more likely it will happen or continue happening. Focus on what you want! You don’t know what you want? Briefly think about what you don’t want and then focus on the opposite. It may be easy to complain about life, but you will need to consciously understand that you’re in control and have the ability be grateful for what you do have. Instead of focusing on being lost and misunderstood, focus on finding love and understanding.
4. Put aside time for writing.
Write whatever is on your mind. It can be a great outlet and stress reliever. I have found vehicles of release through poetry, short stories, lyrics, etc. If you’re not into creative writing or you’re a serious student of personal development, then I highly recommend keeping a journal. It’s a great way to track your progress and store your ideas.
5. Exercise more.
When you’re feeling lost and lonely, exercise may be the last thing on your mind. Commit to making exercise a priority. Exercising will help build confidence, get your mind off worries, and release those “feel good” hormones (e.g. endorphines). You can also participate in group exercises and socialize with other positive people.
6. Learn to love yourself and the journey you’re on.
“You, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” ~ Buddha.
Dissolve any inner criticisms, guilt and hate. If you can’t trust and love yourself, how can you expect someone else to? If you aren’t satisfied with where you are in life right now, fall in love with the idea that better days are coming.
7. Smile.
Dale Carnegie said it well: “Nobody needs a smile as much as the person who has none to give.” Smiling has the power to change your mindset. I used to rarely smile, and was stuck thinking that smiling was so uncool and a sign of weakness. For me smiling may have seemed forced at first, but it now comes naturally. As a result, I’ve become more approachable and have encountered countless opportunities just because I had a positive demeanor while everyone else was mean-mugging.
Think about it: When you do finally find yourself, wouldn’t you rather meet yourself with a welcome smile? 🙂
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